When you have an open wound on your hand (in my case, from slipping while trying to drive a screw into cement backerboard and thrusting the full weight of the drill and it's sharp, pointy Philips-head bit into the tip of my index finger), and you are spreading grout on new tile, for the love of God, wear gloves. I would especially advise against using that same finger to smooth the grout line, further driving the grout into the open wound.
I think that finger is now completely devoid of fingerprints. I could commit a really heinous crime, and they'd have no way of catching me. As long as only my index finger touched any surfaces.
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Worth a shot
ReplyDeleteNot that fingering young women is a crime!
I hope you realise that it’s only a matter of time before someone reading this decides it’s his way of carrying out a perfect crime. At least a crime that depends of fingerprint detection for a conviction.
ReplyDelete(This observation having been made just after having watched a YouTube video in Jaredj’s blog of a young man ‘testing’ a bullet-proof vest on one of his mates – and finding it didn’t work.)
"further driving the grout into the open wound"
ReplyDeleteWell, at least your finger will have that nice, finished look. I mean, you wouldn't want it to look like the contractors just up and left in the middle of a job!
Hope the grout's a nice neutral color. Wouldn't want it to clash with your shirts.
My finger is a (possibly infected) mess, but my grout lines are friggin' perfect. Of course, I used a brick pattern in laying the tile, so I don't have to worry about straight lines from floor to ceiling. Offsetting them the way I did hides the fact that I'm completely incompetent when laying tile.
ReplyDeleteI am now thoroughly aroused by the visual of a pussing yet perfectly smooth fingertip. Thanks, Steve. I will cherish this forever.
ReplyDeleteI do know what the lay-deeez like, yo.
ReplyDeleteDo you own your own wet saw?
ReplyDeleteI hear the ladies love that.
And your finger is now water resistant also. Good for underwater crime or fingerblasting.
ReplyDeleteWet saws? I thought they liked jackhammers.
Luna, I DO own my own wet saw, actually (does it count if I stole it from my mother?)
ReplyDeleteKona, I got your jackhammer right here.
Thanks for the tip. It'll work great for the bank job. Wasn't really keen on the acid wash thing.
ReplyDeleteacid wash is for jeans only! Party like it is 1984!!!
ReplyDeleteWell, thanks for the tip! We're edging our way toward that work. Right now I'm concentrating on filling my nose and lungs full of dried drywall compound dust. So far so good.
ReplyDeleteYankeedog, take it from me.....find yourself a bunch of out of work day-laborers (you can't swing a dead cat here in Atlanta without hitting a bunch), and pay them to lay the tile and grout. You'll be happier in the long run.
ReplyDeleteMust be Home Improvement week (hopefully not involving a Tim Allen sitcom marathon on cable) - spent most of the last five days hacking and slashing through our backyard getting it presentable for putting the place on the market - arms covered in scratches and gouges from greenery that fought back - I look like a very enthusiastic but fairly inaccurate self-harm aficionado. Still, the ladies love the home improvement war wounds. Tiling and grouting is a bastard of a job - second only to laying pavers in its crapness.
ReplyDeleteI *think* I would almost rather lay pavers, simply for the opportunity to be outside breathing caustic dust, rather than inside breathing caustic dust.
ReplyDeleteAnd Dr. Yobbo, aren't you a little old to be cutting yourself, you Emo freak?
This past week was Spring Break, that was my excuse. Although in fairness, our bathroom renovation started about 2 months ago. Demolition took a few weeks, construction took a bit longer.
I'VE got kona's jackhammer!
ReplyDeleteso steve, you know that if your finger gets all puffy, red, hot to the touch.. you best get your ass into the doc asap, right? cellulitis is a bitch. and an extremely painful shot in the ass..