Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Bus Stop

Each morning, I go outside as my elder daughter, Thing 1, goes to the bus stop across the street and waits for the school bus. I'm usually out there with mug of coffee in hand, and I walk down the driveway to get the newspaper and hang out, reading the front page, waiting for the school bus, and just in general being there in the event bullies jump out of the bushes and scare the kids.

Thing 1's bus stop is one of the last ones on the route before the bus heads off to the school, and often times, throughout the year, a car will come zooming up behind the bus and drop off a kid or three, who apparently missed the bus. The school is only a five minute drive away, but it's a hell of a lot easier to deposit the kids at one of the last stops in the neighborhood. Often, the mother is slightly disheveled, hair not done, sometimes wearing slippers or whatever Crocs were sitting by the door.

Today, a red Ford Expedition pulled up behind the bus, and the mother got out to open the back door to let 3 kids out. She was wearing pajamas, which consisted of tight grey pants, almost in a yoga pant style, with a thin grey top, showing a midriff of about 3 inches (no lower back tattoo...I looked), spaghetti straps, obviously no bra, and hair that was hastily pulled back in a pony tail. This of course showed off lots of shoulder, neck, and a grand display of chest salad.

My brother, who lives in the heart of New York City, can't imagine living anywhere other than a big city. I, on the other hand, could never live anywhere other than Suburbia. Especially during the school year. When the weather is warm.

Any escape might help to smooth
The unattractive truth
But the suburbs have no charms to soothe
The restless dreams of youth

-Neil Peart, as sung by Geddy Lee, "Subdivisions"

Geddy obviously never experienced the joy of watching a pajama-clad MILF trying to catch a school bus for her kids. Of course, he's from Canada, so they were probably wearing coats even in June. However, in the Desperate Housewives era, I'm perfectly fine living in a subdivision.


  1. Nice to see someone appreciates us.

    Not that I would be caught dead in public without a bra after having and breastfeeding 3 kids, but there you go.

  2. This is a beautiful post! Photos please!

  3. Luna, she may not have breastfed all of these kids. And if she did, well, let's just say you wouldn't know it.

    Lermontov, if I knew where she lived, I'd put a plan into place to ensure her kids missed the bus each and every day for the next week.

  4. One of those kids may not have been hers, she looked nothing like the other kids. Maybe a neighbor's child.

    But, I'll certainly keep an eye out for her and report back my findings.

  5. oh lunamor i am sure its not that bad.. let them breathe. well at least for the benefit for people like steve that brightens their day just to see you at the bus stop.

  6. I think we need pictures. Just to show you’re not making this up.

  7. yeah, steve.. where was the blackberry?

  8. Sounds like a hard, miserable, unrewarding life you lead, Steve.

    Blackberry FAIL.

  9. And to think I had always assumed living near a bus stop would be a bad thing!

    Mind you I live next door to a primary school.

  10. You've inspired me to head out on MILF patrol today!

  11. This story is not true unless you post pictures.

  12. Yobbo, it's hard work, conforming in order to avoid being cast out.

    Naut, my God, you must live in a MILF target rich environment. Fortunately, this is a school bus stop, not a public transportation bus stop. All I see are school kids and MILFS. No semi-homeless people.

    Lerm, take the point, report back with your sightings.

    Indy, I talked about Puerto Ricans in my last entry, but posted no pictures. Does that mean Puerto Ricans don't exist?

    I'll bring my Blackberry with me each day until the end of school, in the hopes that this woman is again a slacker, and again appears across from my house, braless and jammie-clad.

  13. That is a beauty way to start the day.

    How about them Canes skeaking by in another game 7 thriller last night?

  14. You're killing me. Absolutely killing me. Damn Canes.